I have recently gotten into Yelp. I enjoy reading reviews, both of places I haven’t been, so that I can see if I’m heading into somewhere considered worthwhile, as well as to places I like, so that I can see if my assessment of the business matches the opinions of the masses.
I also enjoy writing reviews on places that I feel deserve a review. I won’t write a review for every place I go to, but only if a place really sticks out at me.
It got me thinking, I wonder if you could categorize Yelp users based on their reviews. Here are a few (somewhat tongue-in-cheek at times) categories based on their reviews:
The Chatterbox Yelp Reviewer
If you have over 100 Yelp reviews under your belt, this is you. This person loves to tell the world about what they think no matter if the world wants to hear it or not. They have an opinion on everything and everybody and Yelp is a great way for the world to hear how every place in town has served or not served their needs.
The Smile Sharing, Fun Loving Yelp Reviewer
If you have all positive Yelp reviews, then you’re a person that loves to smile and wants to see other people smile, and you figure what better way to spread smiles than point people to businesses that have made you smile. After all, if you once bought a cookie that put a smile on your face all day long, you figure that everybody deserves a cookie. And a smile, of course.
The Glass Is Always Empty Yelp Reviewer
If you have mostly negative reviews, then you’re probably someone who is, well, a tad hard to please. You just figure that you have high standards, and you just can’t figure out why the world can’t get it together. It’s easy, all they have to do is read your Yelp review and make the necessary corrections, and things would be much better, am I right?
The Facts of Life Yelp Reviewer
There are people who will write a positive review but will have to include something negative, or vice versa. An overwhelmingly positive or fully negative review just doesn’t exist. If it’s good, you can’t let a good review get to their head, and if it’s bad, you have to provide some encouragement. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have….this type of Yelp reviewer!
The Foodie Yelp Reviewer
If all of your Yelp reviews are tied to restaurants, then you’re definitely a foodie, and your reviews should be the ones at the top of the list to get a true sense of whether that soup stand is worth the wait or not.
The Yelp Reviewer With The Best of Intentions
If your Yelp review gets three stars (out of five) and a one sentence review, like “Pretty good, but could be better” then you fall squarely into this category. You put your review out there, oblivious that any person reading it will come away with no more information after reading it than they had beforehand. As for whether you’d go back? Well, that’s a definite maybe!
The Name Dropping Yelp Reviewer
You don’t just review “B&C Electronics”, you review every person that works in the store. From Joe, the person that greeted you, to Cassandra, the cashier that smiled but gave you the wrong change, to Bill, the manager who explained the return policy to you as you walked out, you make sure that everybody gets credit, good or bad, for their work.
The Roach Whisperer Yelp Reviewer
I love reading reviews of hotels, even hotels that I never visit or plan to visit, only because there is always, without fail, a person who finds roaches or other bugs in their room. You could have 100 reviews where things are perfect, but there is always one person that somehow manages to go into their room and find roaches. Sometimes they’re dead, sometimes they’re alive, and it usually so happens that the bugs somehow bring along the condition known as ‘Noisy Air Conditioner Syndrome’ to the room, as well.
The Mobile Device Yelp Reviewer
Ever see the Yelp reviews that are written in all lower case (or worse yet, all upper case), have about one-third the punctuation that one would normally expect to see, and three times the spelling errors that pass the limits of being acceptable? Chances are, you’ve found the person who does Yelp on their smart phone, and haven’t quite mastered the art of touch screen typing.
The Forgetful Yelp Reviewer
There’s always the person that wrote one Yelp review like four years ago and then never did anything else. Chances are they forgot their password.
Readers, am I the only person that gets a kick out of Yelp reviews? What type of Yelp reviewer are you?